The Spider and the Fly

Said the spider to the fly, “come into my Parlour please”.  The fly resisted, the spider persisted, with skillful coercion the fly drew closer. Peeping playfully, fluttering then stuttering, the fly finally concluded there was no harm in exploring further, so into the web it joyfully went….

The web did feel soft and cosy, just as the spider had said, so the fly relaxed into the space feeling at ease with a sense of peace. A fly it is and fly it must, so soon its wings it began flapping, to be what it was made to be and enjoy its new relationship and new abode.

Confusion started creeping in, with not being able to fly, the web’s softness as each wing touched a thread, made the fly feel there was no need to fear, compounding its confusion.

Confusion mixed with worsening fear, as gradually the fly realized, the pretty web was indeed not what it appeared to be: Silkiness, softness and the intricate design, had been skillfully combined to trap innocent flies for the spider’s gain! The fly became fearful of its glaring inevitable ill fate, if it did not escape from its happy mate who continued very actively to secure it’s nest as best it could, to ensure its pet was wholly its.

Strategy not energy! The harder the victim flapped its wings, the more confused and tired it got. Expending more energy did not seem to help, it was getting weaker and weaker too, and felt more vulnerable to its friendly foe. Putting up a fight clearly made things worse, it needed a strategy and quickly too, that would ensure coming out safely and staying healthy!

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https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-49914020/mp-rosie-duffield-speaks-of-her-experience-of-domestic-abuse

Please check out The Freedom Programme and Leslie Vernick’s blogs.

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  1. Pingback: Coercive Control – Power! – Wonuola

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